About Me

My photo
So my friends think I talk to much so I decided to set one of these up...I dont know how often ill update this butit wil be enough lol.

Friday, July 10, 2009

So Much Has Happened Since May...

So I know I have been slacking on this so I have decided to do one now...

So since my last post I have moved out of my sister's house, been on vaca, had a huge fight with my best friend and eneded up severing ties with him, and had fallen in love and then fucked it up so bad that he never wants to get back with me. Oh and I am moving in two weeks.

At the beginning of June my sisters tells me that I am going to have to find a place to stay for two weeks because DCFS was going to be there to look over her house to make sure it was up to their standards so she can open her daycare. I was freaking out at first because I had nowhere to go and I didn't really know anyone that well at the time. So I was running out of time and options and I decided to call my friend Brock and ask him. He said that that was totally fine and that he would love to have me. I am still living with Brock now ;) We had been having so much fun together that he asked me to stay with him until I move at the end of this month. We do EVERYTHING together. We go to club together every weekend, we go out to eat all the time, and we just recently started working out together because I am severely out of shape and he is my motivation. He is literally my best friend in the world and it's going to kill me to have to leave him at the end of the month.

So I started talking to this guy a little over a month ago. I was texting my friend, Amanda, who is his bff and who he was visiting at the time from Spain. I guess he had asked her who she was talking to and so she showed him my Facebook and he said that I was really cute. Well we started texting and actually confiscated Amanda's phone the rest time he was there and we texted almost nonstop all day everyday. When he went back to Spain we started messaging each other everyday on Facebook. This went on for like 2 more weeks and then one Sunday he messages me saying that he thinks he was falling for me (keep in mind that I had never met this boy but that didn't matter to me at the time). I was actually really shocked when he said that because I didn't think a guy as gorgeous as he is could fall for a person like me. But I didn't like for his looks. He was genuinely the BEST guy I had ever talked to in my life. No guy had ever treated me with so much respect before in my life. So we were both falling hard for each other and then some complications happended that I don't really want to get into again because it still hurts to think about it. But basically I said some really REALLY mean things to him that I will regret for the rest of my life and he doesn't want anything to do with me anymore. I'll admit that I probably fucked up the best thing that will EVER happen to me and I am going to have to live with that. Most of you are probably thinking, "How could he fall in love with a guy that he has never met before?" Well it is possible. I fell in love with him and he fell in love with me and I hurt him so badly. But I will learn from this. I have to and hopefully I will find someone else somewhere down the road who is just as amazing as he was.

Last week I went to Washington, DC to visit my friend Amanda. We had so much fun. We went to downtown DC and went to the memorials and the took lots of pictures and all that good stuff. She took me to this AMAZING gay bar called Town. it was huge. Two floors with huge dance floors on each floor and really hot dancer boys lol. We also went to VA one day to visit my old Disney roommate Patrick, because that is one her really friends. That is how we met actually. It was really great seeing Patrick. We went shopping and she took me out to eat. I was also there for the 4th of July and we went back to DC that day and spent all day at the National Mall sitting and laying out and napping in front of the Washington Monument and then we watched the fireworks there as well and they were amazing!!! When she took me to the airport on Sunday I actually started crying because I hate goodbyes and I don't know when I will be seeing her again which sucks.

I wanted to move back in with my sister for the last couple weeks that I am here before I move. My best friend, Michael, has been living at my house for a while until he gets back on his feet. Micahel and I have also been arguing a lot lately about stupid stuff. Therefore, Megan said that if I wanted to come to stay with her for the remainder of the time I was in Illinois then Micahel would have to find some place to while I was there because she did not want the risk of us two causing drama which was totally reasonable. I got off work on Monday and went to my sisters house and tried asking Micahel if he could try and find some place to stay so I could spend time with my family before I moved because I don't know when i would be seeing them again. He said that he doesn't know anyone who would take put him up for a couple weeks and that since he just started his new job and he didn't want to leave. I was starting to get really angry and then my sister comes up and sides with him saying that I have Brock to live with so why don't I just stay there. I was absolutely livid. I was hugging my nephew goodnite before he went to bed and I just started crying...actually I was bawling. How could my own sister choose Michael over her own brother? i didn't understand. I picked my nephew up and told him that this will be the last time he would be seeing me for a while and that he must behave for his mother while I was away. As I was saying this I was still bawling my eyes out and he was looking at me all sad with baby blue eyes which made me cry even harder. I called my mum after the boys were and I told her what happened but I could barely get two words out because I was crying so hard. My mum told me that everything would be all rite and to just keep my head and that I will be gone in two weeks and that everything will be better once I was away. I am not mad at my sister. It is her house so I have to do what she says. Michael on the other hand...he has backstabbed me so many times before this that I told him that this was it. I'm so done with him. He's is outta my life for good because he did not even look to see if everyone would put him up. I invited him into to that house when he got kicked out of his friends house, I bought him food, cigarettes, drinks when we went out, everything and this is how I get repaid. Pretty shitty if you ask me. But I am doing better now I guess. I will not be going back to that house while he is there though. I might do something that I will regret later...not that he doesn't deserve it.

So in two weeks I will be moving to Everett, Washington with my other sister, Jessica, and I am SOOOOOO excited. I don't think were actually leaving till August 11th or something but my last day of work is July 31st and she is flying in from Everett on that day and were staying at my parents house for like a week and a half and then I'll be going out there and I couldn't be happier. It is time for me to move again. When I move out there, I think it will be a year from when I moved down to Florida. I will be out there for 8 months I think, Jessica is out at sea (she's in the Navy) and then I will either stay with her when she gets back or move back to Orlando, which is what I want to do. One thing is for sure though: I will NOT be coming back to Illinois. There is nothing for me here and I hate it with a passion. Not the people just the state itself. There is one man who I will so so so so so much when I move. He is such an amazing guy and if I could make him mine I DEFINITELY would. But he has a job here already and family so it is not going to happen unfortunately. But we are going to stay the best friends of course. I am going to miss a LOT of people when I move, but the two people who I am going to miss the most are Brock, my BEST friend in the entire world, and Brent, words cannot describe what that man means to me. I will probably cry when I have to say goodbye to those two, Brent especially. But I will be ok. I am off to bigger and better things and I am so excited for the future.

So this was REALLY long and I do apologize for that. I'll make sure to keep up with this from now on!

Live, Laugh, Love